Don’t Kill The Messenger!

Mar 23, 2021

I’ve been sharing about emotions a lot lately. I know we probably all have a different perspectives around this topic. I personally learned at a very young age to hold in emotions of any type.. I especially did not want to feel or express sadness or anger. There were times when I knew in my gut something was wrong and if I shared it with adults it was negated. Either, no one believed me or they shamed me by saying that I made up the story that I told them. So I learn to stop telling. I learn to stop feeling. I learn to stop trusting myself. Especially, I learned not to trust adults or others.

Growing up we all learn what works best for us individually. Meaning, we learn how to behave to get the most approval and to stop any pain of punishment. In learning to become someone else, we also learned to distrust ourselves and hide our emotions and feelings. In essence, we learn to deny our truth.

A lot of times this behavior as a child will protect us, even at times, save our lives. When we get older, it’s been my experience that this no longer works for me. This behavior of hiding my feelings and my truth no longer serves me. In fact, not only it doesn’t serve me, it hinders me from growing and becoming my best self.

I’m learning it is no longer wise for me to push down or neglect or not allow myself to feel all of my emotions. As an adult I know in my heart to trust myself. I’m learning to trust my emotions the ones that feel good along with the ones that doesn’t necessarily feel so good.

I believe that as a society we’ve been taught to smile through the pain no matter what. I also believe that this is probably one of the top causes for everyone being on antidepressants and anti-anxiety medicine. When we stop the flow of our emotions and try to suppress them they will find ways to rear their head. They will find ways to get our attention.

We must stop killing the messenger of our emotions. How are we killing emotions? I believe when we are experiencing sadness or anger or a myriad of other emotions that doesn’t feel so good, instead of listening to ourselves and what they’re trying to tell us we reach for something that will stop the pain.

I agree, some of the deep sadness and anger doesn’t feel good. I believe that it’s trying to tell us something about ourselves. Our emotions are messengers from our soul. Instead of medicating in whatever form we do whether it be prescription medicine, alcohol, bad behaviors that will temporarily make us feel better we would benefit greatly by sitting alone with ourselves and writing out our feelings, talking to a friend or therapist.

Maybe our bodies are telling us that we need to find a balance in our work home life. Maybe the emotions are saying that a relationship no longer serves us. Maybe our emotions are telling us to set healthy boundaries with those who are not treating us with love and respect. Maybe our emotions are telling us that we need to love ourselves more, to forgive ourselves or someone else.

From now on, I will no longer call my emotions, whether they feel good or bad, right or wrong. I know they are here as a messenger from my soul to tell me something that will help me in someway. My true self is speaking to me and asking me to love myself more, to give myself more grace, to create a more balanced life.

When we don’t listen to the messages from our soul and we medicate to regulate we will not heal our lives and overcome our circumstances and situations. Our emotions are guidepost to help us navigate through life. We can trust them and ourselves

Practice with small things. Practice listening to the small hunch that you get that Spurs you on to go somewhere to do some thing. Listen to the feeling that says maybe you should decline an invitation and not take on one more responsibility or activity. Listen to your emotions when you feel tired and allow yourself and your body and your soul to rest and find peace. Take the baby steps to gain the trust in yourself. Start with small things. The more you practice this the more you will learn to trust the big feelings, the ones that seem to overwhelm you. Start by asking yourself, what is this emotion trying to tell me.

I can tell you from experience it’s not always easy to trust your gut and to listen to your soul. It’s not always easy because sometimes to listen to ourselves will appear to others to betray them. To listen to ourselves we may have to make some big changes in our lives. To listen to ourselves we may have to break the mold from who we’ve always been to become someone new and fresh. This new self is not new however. It is your true self. It’s always been there. This takes courage.

If we want to feel and live a fulfilled life the only way to do it is to listen to the message from our own heart and our own souls and follow that to the exclusion of all other voices on the outside telling us what we should or should not do, should or should not be or should or should not have.

Trust that the universe at its core is nothing but pure love and we are made from that. At our core we are nothing but light, energy and pure love. From this place we can trust ourselves, listen to our inner knowing and begin living out of our heart maybe for the first time.

Be brave and courageous my loves. Be patient with yourself in the process. Create some alone time just to hear what you’re saying from the inside and follow that. You cannot go wrong. Love yourself enough to follow your own heart and in doing so, in the end you will be more of a blessing to others than you ever could before.